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Fic: Lay Back, Light Up

Title: Lay Back, Light Up
Author: seren_canis
Recipient: grandilloquism
Rating: PG
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Highlight for Warnings: *kissing, fluff *
Word Count: 2711
Link to original page: Here!
Summary: Sirius Black, for all his self-proclaimed charm, was not that apt at gift giving. Neither Sirius nor Remus know what to get the other for Christmas, they go seeking advice. Written for grandilloquism for Remus/Sirius Small Gifts 2010
Author's notes: Inspiration came from a lot of places for this! Title taken from the beautiful Light Up by Tegan and Sara; James’ line “get along little doggie” from The Maker Makes by Rufus Wainwright, and the whole story inspiration came from a wonderful song by an extremely unknown wrock band named HMS Wolfstar called “Give Me The Moon”. And yes, a bundimun is a real thing, it came from canon, not my lazy brain! XD Dedicated to grandilloquism, in the hope that she enjoys my feeble attempt at romance : )

Sirius Black, for all his self-proclaimed charm, was not that apt at gift giving.

In his first year at Hogwarts, when he was eleven years old and itching to reach the sparkling grey in his eyes that declared his winter birthday, he gave James Potter a dead bundimun in his bed. Now, a bundimun, as an unfortunate James Potter found out that Christmas morning of 1971, is a secreting green-ish fungus with dead grey eyes that stares up at you, nonplussed, as it oozes all over your favourite blue pyjamas. They are putrid, disgusting, notoriously difficult to get rid of and in Sirius’ eyes, the perfect present for a boy you were at unofficial war with.

Sirius Black and James Potter had not been friends that Christmas. In fact, it took until the grey gleamed January of 1972 for them to break their sworn status as enemies.

Sirius turned 12 that January, and having received nothing from his family except distance and shame, older Slytherins began to mock him. James, having finally understood that Sirius’ haughty distaste at being sorted in to Gryffindor came not from arrogance, but from confusion and shame, decided to draw on his Gryffindor courage and sense of right. He happily tucked his wand in to his back pocket, drew up his sleeves, and proceeded to throw a punch at any Slytherin that dare sneer at his new friend’ unhappiness. As James pulled back his fist from the shocked face of Acario Travers, Sirius turned and stared at him. His face broke in to a gleeful grin and thus begin their friendship. From that day on, they were as close as brothers, and always wordlessly had each others back. After all, you don’t just let someone pick a fight with five burly O.W.L. level Slytherins and not be their friend.


In his second year, Sirius Black felt a sense of sheepish apology, and so spent a large lump of gold buying a mountain of sweets for his three new friends. James roared with appreciative laughter, Peter squeaked with surprised delight, and Remus simply raised both his eyebrows in bemused gratefulness as Sirius poured out the waterfall of coloured sweet wrappers on to their beds.

They spent that Christmas day eating their way to the bottom of the mountain, and that Christmas night clapping each other on the back as they vomited Sirius’ presents down the toilet.


Sirius Black liked to think of himself as rather free from fuss and needless worry, but one thing that he did like to worry about was gift giving.

Sirius Black cared about his friends. He tried to show how much they meant to him by taking the piss out of them and beating up Slytherins for them, but it was also nice once in a while to actually give them things. If being raised in Grimmauld Place had taught him one thing, it was that in some peoples eyes, material possessions equalled love (as made apparent by his every Christmas in that house-hold, opening expertly packaged parcels under piles and toppling towers of expensive gifts). And try as he might, Sirius could never shake off every ethic and eccentricity engraved in to him by that house.

Sirius Black loved Remus Lupin. As certain as the blood that flowed through his veins, as deep as the marrow in his bones, he loved Remus. He had even managed to say it to Remus a few times since their fumbling start in to teenage love, but he doubted Remus took these seriously (In all fairness, at these moments of proclaimed love, there always seems to be more pressing matters at hand, and Remus laughed of these remarks with a fond “I know“).

But now it was Christmas. It was Sirius’ favourite time of year, the time when the Great Hall’s food was always warm and heavy, student’s breath smoked and spiralled in the corridors, and Remus always wore that adorable scarf of his. Sirius loved the glowing lights, the tall trees, and the over-the-top Christmas decorations. As much as he liked to deny it, Sirius Black really was a fan of ostentatious displays.

Thinking of a gift for James was easy. James liked mischief, Quidditch and Lily Evans. And so that Christmas Sirius bought him a subscription to Quidditch Monthly, and a comb with a note that read “ To my dear Prongs, In the hope that a more tamed mane will attract your fair lady. - Padfoot.

Peter was even easier. He liked sweets and expensive shirts. So Sirius got him a block of golden marzipan, and a deep blue shirt from Albinka & Co, Creators of Fine Clothing that was a nice contrast to Peter’ ocean blue eyes, if Sirius may so himself.

Remus, on the other hand, was all together more tricky.

Oh, he knew what Remus liked all right. Remus liked gloves and itchy scarves. He liked the smell of read books and paper-brown globes. He liked being the best in Charms class and slouching in the worn Divination chairs. He liked to catch snow on his tongue and run his fingers along Sirius’ wrists. He liked it when Sirius breathed on his neck and kissed his throat. He liked the sound of metal as Sirius unbuckled his belt and slid his hand up his back…

Sirius shook his head. He would have to ask James for advice as to what to get him.


“Bloody hell Padfoot, he’s your boyfriend, why should I think of something?”

“Please James, I’m just asking if you’ve got any ideas, I‘m not asking you to get it”

“Good. ‘Cause I don’t have any ideas.”

Sirius sighed and flopped himself on the bed next to James. James turned to look at him.

“Why are you worrying about this so much, anyway?”

Sirius rubbed the back of his head. “I…I don’t know. I just want to show him I really love him, you know?”

James groaned, but said no more, which Sirius took to be a good sign. Then, he said “Why don’t you do something for him?”

“Mm?” Sirius looked up.

“Don’t get him something. Do something for him.”

“Uh, I’m not quite sure I understand what you’re getting at…”

James groaned again. “Ew Padfoot, not like that, I wouldn’t want to encourage that sort of behaviour….I meant some sort of romantic gesture!”

And with that, Sirius leaped up. With a grin he kissed James sloppily on the cheek and proclaimed, “Prongs, you’re a genius! A romantic genius! Honestly, if Lily Evans doesn’t pick you up in the next few months, give me a call!”

“Yeah, yeah, you daft sod,” James complained rubbing his cheek vigorously “Stop slobbering all over me you mutt!”

“No, really, thank you Prongs.”

“All right now. Get along little doggie.”

And with that, Sirius flashed him a swift, glittering grin and departed the dormitory.


Sirius would have given him anything.

Sirius wanted to give him a thunderous rainstorm to kiss under. He wanted to give him a treasure trove of delicate glass sugar, an oak shelf heavy with rich, healing chocolate. He wanted to give him all the books under the sun, he wanted their paper-parchment smell to congratulate their love as they kissed. Sirius wanted to knit him lovely home-made things, only he didn’t know how to knit. He wanted to give him all the glittering heirlooms of Grimmauld Place, if only to cover him in precious things as a prince should.

Sirius wanted to make declarations of love made of small, sweet gestures that he knew would be appreciated by his quiet, affectionate Moony.

Sirius Black was desperately love-struck. He was a hormonal teenage boy and he thought in grand gestures. Sometimes Sirius’s toes tingled with the urge to counter balance these desperate thoughts with equally wild actions, and he sometimes lay at night and made mental lists about how to do such things.

Of these lists (which were never borne on parchment, but nevertheless never left his mind) were such things as conjuring rain clouds, naming stars, carving trees and capturing the moon. The magic that tingled through his blood made him believe such things were possible, and he set about how to achieve these things.

The only time when his mind would slow down enough for him to begin to articulate such a plan was at night. He would lie there, bathed in curtain light, circling gentle shapes on to the back of Remus’ hands and thought quietly to himself. The sound of Remus’ gentle slumber complimented the whirr of his brain.

And one night, at precisely 3:14 in the morning, Sirius found it. Snuggled up deep in the back of his mind had been the perfect thought all along. The perfect gift for Remus that summed up Sirius’ feelings for the boy. And he had found it.

Sirius let out a whoop of triumph in the still night air. Peter grumbled in his sleep, and Sirius laughed to himself, turned over and fell in to an easy dream.


“Are you ready to go Moony?”

“I think so. Where are we going?”

When Sirius smiled you could almost see the swirl and mix of excitement in the grey of his eyes. “It’s time for your Christmas present.”

The air was still and quiet in Gryffindor tower that night. James and Peter had long gone to bed, weighed down by the heaviness of the Christmas feast and the satisfaction of having received good presents that morning. Remus and Sirius were curled up comfortably on the common room sofa together, wrapped in each others scent.

Remus uncurled himself from around Sirius and watched the anticipation dance in his eyes. “My Christmas present? Then what was that book on constellations you gave me this morning?”

“Oh that!” said Sirius waving his hand dismissively. “That was just to tide you over until your real present!”

Remus raised an eyebrow. He had to agree, it had worked well. While Sirius and James had spent that afternoon setting of fireworks in the empty classrooms and corridors, and Peter re-examined all his new trinkets and gifts, Remus had read, quite happily, about the formation and structure of Arcturus Major and Ursa Minor.

“So, are you ready?” Sirius face was earnest and eager, almost like it had been the very first time he had transformed in to Padfoot. Remus sincerely hoped his surprise gift wasn’t as earth-shattering as that.


Sirius took his hand and led him to the portrait hole. Through the corridors they weaved, in and out of the casting moonlight that fell through the tall windows, until Remus could no longer tell where they were. He wondered how Sirius knew where to go without the Map. He then realised with a groan and an overwhelming fondness, that Sirius had probably planned this for weeks.

Finally, they arrived at a door.

Remus gazed up at the big wooden panels and the gleaming bronze handle that was in the shape of a star and a crescent moon.

“Where did this door come from?”

Sirius was practically buzzing with magic, bouncing on his heels in excitement. “From nowhere. From magic. From me.”

Remus looked at him curiously.

Sirius smiled. “Open it.”

Remus placed his hand on the warm oak panels, pushed.

And opened a door in to an immense forest.

Tall trees and pines, oaks and firs, hawthorns and hollies, thick trunks with trickling roots stood as far as the eye could see. The floor was a soft earth, sprinkled with pine needles, and the green smell of sap stung Remus’ nose. The air was warm and calm, without the hint or wave of a bird song, and most spectacularly of all, the sky was a jewellery-store case of glittering stars.

Remus turned to stare at Sirius, who was grinning like a dog who had just delivered his master a particularly delicious bone.

“You did this?” Remus asked, incredulousness and amazement coating and condensing his voice in to a breathless whisper.

“Yes. Come on.” Sirius spun around and closed the door behind them, engulfing them into the glowing green darkness of the forest. As soon as he closed the door Remus had no idea how they would find it again. He turned around, and saw trunks and roots and earth wherever he looked. Sirius smiled at his bewilderment and grabbed his hand.

He led him through the trees. The sky above them was a heavy, painted black canvas, the trees were scratchy and fresh, and nothing would have ever made Remus think they were still inside the castle. There was even a breeze.

They stepped through the trees, they fingers entwined, crunching the soft twigs beneath them and breathing in the almost perfect night air.

Remus’ fingers that weren’t intertwined with Sirius’ brushed trunks as they passed by.

“Sycamores…” breathed Remus, touching the dark wood. He looked down at the dark wood of his own wand that stuck out of his pocket.

Sirius smiled at him. “Yeah. It’s a nice personal touch, isn’t it?”

Remus grinned back. “It’s perfect Sirius. Are we where I think we are?”

Remus had a strong suspicion that Sirius had managed to do what six years of searching the castle for its every secret hadn’t allowed them to do. Even with Peter’s transformation form handy, and the painstaking creation of the map to deal with, they had never succeeded in finding what they suspected might only be a legend.

“The Room of Requirement,” whispered Remus .

Sirius nodded vigorously.

Remus raised an eyebrow and burst in to laughter.

Sirius laughed along with him.

“How the hell did you manage to find this, all on your own, when you can’t even pay attention in Charms class?” Remus laughed out through his smile, the sound reflecting in his eyes.

“Well, this was more important than some stupid Charms class!”

“You are brilliant sometimes, Sirius.”

“Well, I have my moments,” he grinned soppily at Remus.

Sirius continued to navigate them through the trees until they reached a small rise. The grass-covered rise was the only part of the forest that was momentarily free of trees, and a clear patch of pitch-black sky could be seen clearly above.

They walked to the top of the rise together, the velveteen sky their only destination.

Sirius began to buzz with excitement again as they made their way, the membranes of his cells seemed to hum with anticipation, and Remus could only guess what his tangible excitement was about. Was there really more surprises to come? Remus smiled the himself; he didn’t think his little ticker heart could take it.

“Sit down.”

Remus looked at Sirius, then sat on the dew-crested grass. Sirius sat down next to him.

“Close your eyes.”

Remus obliged.

“Lie back.”

Remus did this also, letting himself fall back on to the soft grass, his knees bent and his arms by his side.

He felt Sirius fall back on to the grass, laying besides him. Sirius found his hand and squeezed it.



”Open your eyes,” he breathed.

Remus opened them.

And saw the bright orb of the moon.

It was full and heavy in the sky, it’s outline a perfect circle that could in no way be confused with its waxing sister. Bright stars were peppered all around it, humble and hopeful in it’s light. It was perfectly formed, perfectly bright, and utterly beautiful.

Remus gasped.


“Merry Christmas, Moony,” Sirius whispered.

“How…how is this…”

“It’s not real, don’t worry,” Sirius added hastily, “It took quite a while, but I eventually got it to look just like the real thing. The Room of Requirement will give you anything you want.” Sirius turned to face Remus. “It’s so beautiful Remus. I wanted you to see that. I wanted to give you the moon.”

Remus closed the space between them in a heartbeat and kissed him.

Sirius kissed back and smiled when he felt Remus’ immense smile in their kiss.

When Remus pulled back a smile broke all worry and reserve in his face, casting light instead on a boy whose face shone with happiness .

“It’s utterly perfect Padfoot. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

And Sirius knew, this time, that Remus knew he meant it.


( 14 comments — Leave a comment )
Dec. 26th, 2010 04:36 pm (UTC)
[Hi, seren--for some reason I can't seem to send you a PM. Trying a comment instead!]

Oh, fabulous!

The deal is this: you can only have one post in the queue at any given time. I'll post the first round of bonus gifts on Wednesday morning (New York/Eastern US time)--can you add yours between Wednesday morning, when they go up, and Thursday morning, when I'll post the second? If you're not around, we can work on other ways to get it up.

Thanks so much for creating not just one but two bonus gifts!
Dec. 26th, 2010 08:02 pm (UTC)
[Commentng is totally fine!]

Unfortunately I'm going to be at my dads from Monday afternooon to Thursday afternooon, and he ives in a Weasley-eque barn in the middle of nowhere, so I won't be near my computer :(. Any other way I could get the fic up? So much thanks for your help, siriusly!

Dec. 26th, 2010 08:08 pm (UTC)
Ah! Another option, then: if you want to e-mail me the text of the fic (it's a fic, right?), I can post it on Thursday a.m. using the smallgiftsmods account. The downside is that comments won't automatically come to you, but you can track the post, so that you're notified when someone leaves a comment, so you can reply. ETA: magnetic.pole.too at gmail or smallgiftsmods at gmail will both work.

Would that work for you?

A Weasley-esque barn in the middle of nowhere sounds very relaxing!


Edited at 2010-12-26 08:09 pm (UTC)
Dec. 26th, 2010 08:13 pm (UTC)
Thanks for the fast reply!

That would be really great, what do I email the fic to? :)

Ha, yeah it's very christmas-y! But cold. :P
Dec. 26th, 2010 08:22 pm (UTC)
Why don't we say you'll send the text of the fic all formatted (just as if you were about to post it yourself) to both:

- me (magnetic.pole.too at gmail) and
- the mod's account (smallgiftsmods at gmail)

Just to be sure. Thanks and have a great week! Maggie
Dec. 26th, 2010 08:27 pm (UTC)
Sent! :D Thanks so much, again!
Dec. 26th, 2010 08:46 pm (UTC)
Seren, your messages haven't arrived at either place. Would you mind trying again? Thank you! M.
Dec. 26th, 2010 08:59 pm (UTC)
Oh no! I've tried again, sent to magnetic.pole.too@gmail.com and smallgiftsmods@gmail.com. Is that right?
Dec. 26th, 2010 09:42 pm (UTC)
Gah! Those are both correct, but there's no message either place. Hm. Very odd. And disturbing.

Why don't we wait a few hours to see if it shows up? Will you still be online this evening?

Another possibility, if your message still hasn't appeared, is that you can try posting the text in a comment here, and I can cut and paste and reformat. M.
Dec. 26th, 2010 09:48 pm (UTC)
It's in my sent box :(. Stupid hotmail. Shall I pm it to you? I've got it all formatted. X
Dec. 26th, 2010 10:08 pm (UTC)
Got it! We should be all set now, S. Have a great week, and thanks again for all your work! M.
Dec. 26th, 2010 10:13 pm (UTC)
YES! Thanks so much for being so understanding & helpful, have a brilliant rest of the holidays! :D -puppy licks- S x
Jan. 1st, 2011 06:02 pm (UTC)
All set! Posted this morning here:


The only catch was that the formatting didn't come through, so I lost your lj-cut line. (Hopefully that was the only thing!) If you want to add the original cut line or any other changes, just let me know.

Happy 2011!

Jan. 2nd, 2011 07:15 pm (UTC)
I can't express my thanks, thank you so much for all your help! :D The LJ-cut line you used was fine, the post was perfect ^^

Happy New Year, have a great 2011!
( 14 comments — Leave a comment )